Most of us have had the experience of tackling some dreaded task only to come out the other side feeling invigorated, filled with a new sense of confidence and strength. The funny thing is, most of the time when we do them, we come out on the other side changed and often wondering what we were so worried about or why it took us so long. We may even begin to look for other tasks we’ve been avoiding so that we can feel that same heady mix of excitement and completion.
Whether we avoid something because it scares us or bores us, or because we think it will force a change we’re not ready for, putting it off only creates obstacles for us. On the other hand, facing the task at hand, no matter how onerous, creates flow in our lives and allows us to grow. The relief is palpable when we stand on the other side knowing that we did something even though it was hard or we didn't want to do it. On the other hand, when we cling to our comfort zone, never addressing the things we don’t want to face, we cut ourselves off from flow and growth.
We all have at least one thing in our life that never seems to get done. Bringing that task to the top of the list and promising ourselves that we will do it as soon as possible is an act that could liberate a tremendous amount of energy in our lives. Whatever it is, we can allow ourselves to be fueled by the promise of the feelings of exhilaration and confidence that will be the natural result of doing it.
Outside The Comfort Zone: Things We Don't Want To Do
On Having A Mentor A Lesson from Alexander The Great: Asoka Selvarajah, Ph.D
In a recent biography of Alexander the Great, the author, in exploring Alexander's motivations and driving forces, makes some fascinating observations.
It would seem that Alexander was a devoted reader of Homer's great epic poems, The Odyssey and the Iliad; particularly the latter. The Iliad deals with Ancient Greek ideals of hero, warfare and glory in the context of the war against the city of Troy.
Alexander, it would seem, read these stories from an early age and imagined himself to be in the same line as the classic Greek heroes of yesteryear. He was quite obsessive about this poem epic and could recite large sections of it by heart. In fact, he had a special copy made for himself and took it with him on his exploits and conquests of two million square miles of the ancient world.
In particular, his great hero was Achilles, from whom he was said to be a direct descendant through his mother. Throughout his life, Alexander engaged in a sort of rivalry with his hero and sought to outdo Achilles' exploits by his own. He also encouraged comparison between himself and Achilles.
All of this is fascinating from a number of aspects. First and foremost, it is yet another proof - as is repeatedly evidenced by all great achievers in life - that the mind creates reality. In other words, what you dwell upon becomes your reality.
Dwelling on a fictional account of heroism and conquest made one man realize that reality in his own life and conquer most of the known world. This was his role model and what he continually fantasized becoming.
Secondly, in so identifying with Achilles, he effectively made him a mentor. This is another common feature of highly successful people. They all have someone they turn to, or seek to emulate.
Usually, that person is alive. Even Bill Gates has a mentor. His name is Warren Buffett; one of the greatest living stock market investors and, like Bill Gates, a multi-billionaire. So if you seek excellence in a particular field, the first thing to do is to try to find someone who already excels in it and try to make their acquaintance and ask that person to be your mentor.
If that person is inaccessible (for now), then read their writings, watch their videos and imagine yourself doing the same. Ask yourself what that person would do in each situation. Imagine being that person.
However, if you have no living mentor who will do, you can create one in your imagination as Alexander must have done with Achilles. You can imagine your mentor performing at the level of excellence you desire and then, as Alexander the Great must have done, step into that person's shoes and imagine it is you excelling and leaving the rest of the world behind.
It is so striking that all highly successful people do a huge amount of imagining and daydreaming. Most of us do not because we feel it is a waste of time and achieves nothing. Strangely, enough, it could be the most important thing we ever do. Without it, all our other "practical" efforts could go for nothing.
In conclusion, (a) seek a mentor in your field of choice - either living, dead or imagined - and seek to emulate that person's excellence; (b) imagine and visualize your future vividly and continually.
Imagine even the utterly impossible, as Alexander the Great did. If you do, who knows what might happen? Your vision of what is possible might just have to expand a lot to fit a much grander design!
Some Time
Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be there. They serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson, or help figure out who you are or who you want to become. You never know who these people may be; your roommate, neighbor, professor, long lost friend, lover or even a complete stranger who, when you lock eyes with theirs, you know that very moment that they will affect your life in some profound way.
Sometimes things happen to you and at the time they may seem horrible, painful and unfair, but in reflection you realize that without overcoming those obstacles you would have never realized your potential, strength, willpower or heart.
Everything happens for a reason. Nothing happens by chance or by means of good or bad luck. Illness, injury, love, lost moments of true greatness and sheer stupidity all occur to test the limits of your soul. Without these small tests, if they be events, illnesses or relationships, life would be like a smoothly paved, straight, flat road to nowhere. Safe and comfortable, but dull and utterly pointless.
The people you meet who affect your life and the successes and downfalls you experience -- they are the ones who create who you are. Even the bad experiences can be learned from ... those lessons are the hardest and probably the most important ones.
If someone hurts you, betrays you or breaks your heart, forgive them, for they have helped you learn about trust and the importance of being cautious about to whom you open your heart.
If someone loves you, love them back unconditionally, not only because they love you, but because they are teaching you to love and opening your heart and eyes to things you would have never seen or felt without them.
Make every day count. Appreciate every moment and take from it everything that you possibly can, for you may never be able to experience it again.
Talk to people you have never talked to before, and actually listen. Let yourself fall in love. Break free and set your sights high. Hold your head up because you have every right to.
Tell yourself you are a great individual and believe in yourself, for if you don't believe in yourself, no one else will believe in you either.
You can make of your life anything you wish.
Create your own life and then go out and live it!
FW: Queer Deaths
Lennon, after saying that the Beatles were more famous than Jesus Christ, was shot six times.
Tancredo Neves (President of Brazil ):
During the Presidential campaign, he said if he got 500,000 votes from his party, not even God would remove him from Presidency.
Sure he got the votes, but he got sick a day before being made President, then he died.
Cazuza (Bi-sexual Brazilian composer, singer and poet):
During A show in Canecio ( Rio de Janeiro ),
while smoking his cigarette, he puffed out some smoke into the air and said:'God, that's for you.'
He died at the age of 32 of LUNG CANCER in a horrible manner.
The man who built the Titanic
After the construction of Titanic, a reporter asked him how safe the Titanic would be.
With an ironic tone he said:
'Not even God can sink it'
The result: I think you all know what happened to the Titanic
Marilyn Monroe (Actress)
She was visited by Billy Graham during a presentation of a show.
He said the Spirit of God had sent him to preach to her.
After hearing what the Preacher had to say, she said:
'I don't need your Jesus'.
A week later, she was found dead in her apartment
Bon Scott (Singer)
The ex-vocalist of the AC/DC. On one of his 1979 songs he sang:
'Don't stop me; I'm going down all the way, down the highway to hell'.
On the 19th of February 1980, Bon Scott was found dead, he had been choked by his own vomit.
Campinas (IN 2005)
In Campinas , Brazil a group of friends, drunk, went to pick up a friend.....
The mother accompanied her to the car and was so worried about the drunkenness of her friends and she said to the daughter holding her hand, who was already seated in the car:
'My Daughter, Go With God And May He Protect You.'
She responded: 'Only If He (God) Travels In The Trunk, Cause Inside Here.....It's Already Full '
Hours later, news came by that they had been involved in a fatal accident, everyone had died,
the car could not be recognized what type of car it had been, but surprisingly, the trunk was intact.
The police said there was no way the trunk could have remained intact. To their surprise, inside the trunk was a crate of eggs, none was broken
Christine Hewitt (Jamaican Journalist and entertainer)
said the Bible (Word of God) was the worst book ever written.
In June 2006 she was found burnt beyond recognition in her motor vehicle.
Many more important people have forgotten that there is no other name that was given so much authority as the name of Jesus.
Many have died, but only Jesus died and rose again, and he is still alive.
'Jesus'
I have done my part, Jesus said
'If you are embarrassed about me,
I will also be embarrassed about you before my father.'
'Lord, I love you and I need you, come into my heart, and bless me, my family, my home, and my friends, in Jesus' name. Amen.'
DEPRESSION FACTS.....A MUST READ
Everyone feels blue at one time or another. A death in the family, a disappointment in your career, a romance gone awry--all can cause most people to feel down for a period of time. Grief and sadness are normal reactions to life's stressful events. After a time, however, most people will heal and return to a normal life.
Depression is more than the normal ups and downs of life that we all have. When sadness just won't go away and it begins to interfere with daily life we recognize this as a mood disorder called depression.
Sometimes depression goes unrecognized because it may manifest itself in more ways than just a sad mood. A depressed person may feel any or all of the following emotions: anger, irritability, hopelessness, fear, anxiety, fatigue, numbness, confusion, worthlessness, or shame. A depressed person may also feel physically ill, weak, or in some cases have hallucinations.
Depression can affect every aspect of your life: your physical health, your sleep, your eating habits, your job, and your relationships with friends and family. It affects your thoughts, feelings and behaviors.
People with untreated depression may choose to self-medicate with drugs or alcohol. They may also relieve their emotional pain by overeating, physically harming themselves (cutting, burning), being sexually promiscuous, or other self-destructive behaviors.
Depression may come on suddenly as result of a stressful event or it may grow slowly over months and years. It may have an apparent cause or it may not seem to have any rhyme or reason. Depressed people suffer from an imbalance in their brain chemistry that makes them especially prone to stress. What may seem a small setback to someone else may be the proverbial straw that broke the camel's back for a person prone to depression.
It is very important for those who love a depressed person--as well as the depression person themselves--to understand that a depressed person suffers from a very real illness. A depressed person cannot just "snap out of it" or "cheer up". They are not weak, lazy, defective, or seeking attention. They are ill and need your help.
Like any other illness, depression is treatable. Although there is no "cure" for depression, it is very controllable. There are a wide variety of medications that are effective in treating depression. With medication, therapy, and time, a depressed person can get well and lead a happy and productive life. I'm living proof of that. When I say living, I mean that literally. Depression is also the number one cause of suicide. If you suspect that you or someone you love is depressed, take steps now to get treatment. You may just save a life.
Interconnected Experiences: Noticing Synchronicity
When events appear to fit together perfectly in our lives it may seem at first that they are random occurrences, things that are the result of coincidence. These synchronous happenings, though, are much more than that, for, if we look at them more closely they can show us that the universe is listening to us and gently communicating with us. Learning to pay attention to and link the things that occur on a daily basis can be a way for us to become more attuned to the fact that most everything happens in our lives for a reason – even when that reason is not clear right away.
When we realize that things often go more smoothly than we can ever imagine, it allows us to take the time to reflect on the patterns in our lives. Even events that might not at first seem to be related to each other are indicators that the universe is working with, not against, us. This idea of synchronicity, then, means that we have to trust there is more to our lives than what we experience on a physical level. We need to be willing to look more closely at the bigger picture, accepting and having confidence in the fact that there is more to our experiences than immediately meets the eye. Being open to synchronicity also means that we have to understand that our lives are filled with both positive and negative events. Once we can recognize that one event is neither more desirable nor better than the other – they all have an overall purpose in our lives -- then we are truly ready to listen to the messages the universe gives us.
While we may not be able to see everything in our lives as being synchronous, we can certainly use hindsight to be more aware of how the universe guides us. This sense of wonder at the mysteries of the universe and the interconnectedness present in our lives will help us see our overall ways of being and will in turn make it easier to work more consciously towards our spiritual evolution.
Being A Strong Container: Grounding Ourselves
We often hear people telling us to ground ourselves, but we may not be sure what that means and how we might do it. Grounding ourselves is a way of bringing ourselves literally back to earth. Some of us are more prone than others to essentially leaving our bodies and not being firmly rooted in our bodies. There’s nothing terribly wrong with this, but while we are living on the earth plane it is best to stay grounded in the body.
One of the easiest ways to ground ourselves is to bring our attention to our breath as it enters and leaves our bodies. After about 10 breaths, we will probably find that we feel much more connected to our physical selves. We might then bring our awareness to the sensations in our bodies, moving from our head down to our feet, exploring and inquiring. Just a few minutes of this can bring us home to bodies and to the earth, and this is what it means to ground ourselves.
We can go further by imagining that we have roots growing out of the bottoms of our feet, connecting us to the earth. The roots flow with us so we can we always move, but at the same time they keep us grounded. We receive powerful energy from the earth just as we do from the forms of energy we associate with the sky, and our body is a tool that brings these two energies together in a sacred union. When we are grounded, we essentially become a strong container in which our spirits can safely and productively dwell. This is why grounding ourselves every day, especially at the beginning of the day, is such a beneficial practice. Fortunately, it’s as simple as bringing our conscious awareness to our bodies and the earth on which we walk.
Part Of The Process: Feeling Stuck
When we feel stuck in our lives it’s important to take stock of what is going on and find out if there is something we are doing or not doing that is keeping us stuck. Sometimes the situation is out of our control, and we need to look within to find the patience required to wait with equanimity until things move forward again. Many times, though, we can find the source of our stagnation in our own hearts and minds. Sometimes we are clinging to old ideas about reality and we need to make adjustments that will bring us back in tune with life, so we can flow again. Sometimes we find that fear of change is what’s keeping us stuck, and we can resolve to find ways of facing that fear.
If introspection does not provide the answers we need, it can sometimes be helpful to ask those around you if they notice anything obvious that you might not be able to see. Remember to ask someone whom you can trust to be kind and sensitive as well as honest. Try to let go of your resistance because whenever there is something we can’t see ourselves, it’s because we don’t want to see it. Try to listen with an open mind, and remember that you are always the final judge of what you need. Anything offered to us from an outside source will need to be processed within before its wisdom can take hold.
In all this, be kind to yourself and remember that we all get stuck sometimes. Think of it as a part of your process, a necessary step on your journey, rather than as a problem that shouldn’t be happening. This can help to keep your frustration at bay and give you the space you need to take a deep breath and really figure out what’s going on.
The Happiest People I know: Alan Cohen
Over dinner one night Dee and I got onto the subject of happiness. "Who do we know who is truly happy?" she asked me. "And what do they know or do that makes them happy?"
Hmmm. I did a quick mental scan. Several faces popped into my mind.
The first was a Japanese friend, Shinn, whom we met during our first visit to Japan. Shinn's energy, magnified by a wide genuine smile, is so radiant that he lights any room he enters. He is a bonfire of love.
Shinn was a cellist who had been diagnosed with cancer. He tried to fight the disease, but only felt worse. Then he decided to love his cancer cells. Every day he sent them blessings and appreciation for the wake-up call they provided. That process was so rewarding that Shinn decided to love his whole life…everyone and everything…no exceptions. The cancer disappeared. Shinn became happy. Shinn became a healer. Now he is an urban legend in Japan.
Next, I thought of my friends Barry and Joyce Vissell, a couple married over 35 years. They have dedicated their lives to their relationship and family, and teach others how to create loving relationships.
"What do Joyce and Barry do that keeps them happy?" Dee asked me.
"They are surrendered to their partnership," I told her. "They value joy more than resistance. They do not resist each other, their relationship, their children, or their life. Their attitude is refreshingly childlike. They don't complicate their hearts with heady issues. Daily they find new ways to appreciate and celebrate their relationship, and it becomes an ever-greater blessing to them and everyone they touch."
"Who else?" Dee asked me.
"Barry Dennis," I answered. Barry is a gifted energetic musician tapped into an infinite flow of creativity. He is passionate about all he does, continually surfing on his intuitive edge. What about Barry makes him happy? He is one with his purpose. He is a musician true to his calling. He does not busy or bother himself with spreadsheets, self-marketing, or waiting tables until he gets his big break. He gives himself a big break every day by letting himself be exactly what he is.
Then I recalled a television documentary I saw about centenarians, people who live to be 100. The interviewer tried to find some element or lifestyle common to people who live a very long time. He examined diet ― nope, lots of them ate meat and junk food. Vices? Some of them drank and smoked. Profession? All kinds. The documentarian was stumped until he realized that all the centenarians were light-hearted. They didn't take life too seriously and they flowed with changes. Nearly all of their friends and family had passed on before them, and they still found beauty and wonder in each new day. They were happy to be alive, and so life kept them alive.
I thought, too, of a conversation I had with a well-known author and speaker. When our conversation casually came around to money, he told me, "I have enough money. I don't really need any more." My first thought was, "Well, sure you make $20,000 a lecture!" After I got over my knee-jerk reaction, I realized that this man has enough money because he decides that what he has is enough. I had never before heard anyone say, "I have enough money." Most people I have met believe they do not have enough money. I know people who have millions of dollars, and it is not enough. I know others who have just a few dollars, and they are quite satisfied. I learned from this man that "enough" is not a condition; it is a choice. People who see through the eyes of enoughness are constantly satisfied. Another clue.
As I scanned my memory bank for other happy folks, I looked across the table at this beautiful, present, and open-hearted woman across from me. I was zooming out on thoughts about how to be happy, when one of the greatest reasons for my happiness was sitting right in front of me. I took Dee's hand and told her, "There's one more element of happiness, maybe the biggest: gratitude. I am grateful to be here with you and to dance with you in the realm of expansive, joyful thoughts. I love it when you talk metaphysical to me." We laughed and enjoyed the rest of our dinner and evening ― far richer for the conversation and insights. Capsule summary of the elements of happiness, learned from my friends who live it: Love it all. Drop resistance. Be true to yourself and your purpose. Lighten up. Find and celebrate enoughness. Say thank you to your loved ones. And talk metaphysical to me whenever possible.
10 Tips to Improve Your Speaking Voice
One of the most important components of public speaking is the sound of your voice. It influences the impact of your message, and might even make or break the success of your speech. Fortunately, for many people, good voice quality can be learned.
Instructions :
- Breathe from your diaphragm - Practice long and controlled exhales. When you speak, use breath to punctuate your point. For example, take a breath at the end of each phrase whether you need to or not. Use that opportunity to pause and let the listeners absorb what you say.
- Use pitch - Lower pitches generally are more soothing to hear. However, modulating your pitch for emphasis will keep your listeners engaged. Develop your pitch by practicing humming.
- Moderate your volume - Find out if you speak too loudly or too softly. When you begin speaking, ask your audience how your volume is (each situation is different). Try to stay at the appropriate volume throughout your speech.
- Moderate your pace - This one is also closely related to breath. If you speak too quickly, people can’t keep up. If you speak too slowly, people will lose interest. Record your speech to determine if you need to change your pace. Get feedback from others.
- Articulate - Try exaggerating your lip movement to reduce mumbling. Practice articulating tongue twisters and extending and exaggerating vowel sounds. Become an expert at articulating tongue twisters as quickly and crisply as possible. Focus on the ones you find difficult.
- Practice your speech in advance and determine where you want to pause for a breath. For more emphasis, pause for more than one breath. Mark your breathing points in your notes.
- Loosen up before you begin. Look side to side. Roll your head in half-circles and roll your shoulders back. Shift your rib cage from side to side. Yawn. Stretch. Touch your toes while completely relaxing your upper body, then slowly stand up, one vertebra at a time, raising your head last. Repeat as needed.
- Posture - Stand up straight and tall to allow full lung capacity and airflow.
- Record your voice repeatedly using different ways of speaking. Determine which one is most pleasing.
- Practice breath control - Take a deep breath, and while you exhale, count to 10 (or recite the months or days of the week). Try gradually increasing your volume as you count, using your abdominal muscles—not your throat—for volume. Don’t let your larynx tense up.
Love Secrets....
The First Secret - The Power Of Thought
Love begins with our thoughts. We become what we think about. Loving thoughts create loving experiences and loving relationships. Affirmations can change our beliefs and thoughts about others and ourselves. If we want to love someone, we need to consider their needs and desires. Thinking about your ideal partner will help you recognize her when you meet her.
The Second Secret - The Power Of Respect
You cannot love anyone or anything unless you first respect them. The first person you need to respect is yourself. To begin to gain self-respect asks yourself, "What do I respect about myself?" To gain respect for others, even those you may dislike, ask yourself "What do I respect about them?"
The Third Secret - The Power Of Giving
If you want to receive love, all you have to do is give it! The more love you give, the more you will receive. To love is to give of yourself freely and unconditionally. Practice random acts of kindness. Before committing to a relationship ask not what the other person will be able to give to you, but rather what will you be able to give them. The secret formula of a happy, lifelong, loving relationship is to always focus on what you can give instead of what you can take.
The Fourth Secret - The Power Of Friendship
To find a true love, you must first find a true friend. Love does not consist of gazing into each other's eyes, but rather looking outward together in the same direction. To love someone completely you must love them for who they are, not what they look like. Friendship is the soil through which love's seeds grow. If you want to bring
love into a relationship, you must first bring friendship.
The Fifth Secret - The Power Of Touch
Touch is one of the most powerful expressions of love, breaking down barriers and bonding relationships. Touch changes our physical and emotional states and makes us more receptive to love.
The Sixth Secret - The Power Of Letting Go
If you love something, let it free. If it comes back to you it's yours, if it doesn't, it never was. Even in a loving relationship, people need their own space. If we want to learn to love, we must first learn to forgive and let go of past hurts and grievances. Love means letting go of our fears, prejudices, egos and conditions. "Today I let go of all my fears, the past has no power over me - today is the beginning of a new life."
The Seventh Secret - The Power Of
Communication
When we learn to communicate openly and honestly, life changes. To love someone is to communicate with them. Let the people you love know that you love them and appreciate them. Never be afraid to say those three magic words: "I Love you." Never let an opportunity pass to praise someone. Always leave someone you love with a loving word - it could be the last time you see them. If you were about to die but could make telephone calls to the people you loved, who would you call, what would you say and.. Why are you waiting?
The Eighth Secret - The Power Of CommitmentIf you want to have love in abundance, you must be committed to it, and that commitment will be reflected in your thoughts and actions. Commitment is the true test of love. If you want to have loving relationships, you must be committed to loving relationships. When you are committed to
someone or something, quitting is never an option. Commitment distinguishes a fragile relationship from a strong one.
The Ninth Secret - The Power Of Passion
Passion ignites love and keeps it alive. Lasting passion does not come through physical attraction alone; it comes from deep commitment, enthusiasm, interest and excitement. Passion can be recreated by recreating past experiences when you felt passionate. Spontaneity and surprises produce passion. The essence of love and happiness are the same; all we need to do is to live each day with passion.
The Tenth Secret - The Power Of Trust
Trust is essential in all loving relationships. Without it one person becomes suspicious, anxious and fearful and the other person feels wrapped and emotionally suffocated. You cannot love someone completely unless you trust them completely. Act as if your relationship
with the person you love will never end. One of the ways you can tell whether a person is right for you is to ask yourself, "Do I trust them completely and unreservedly?" If the answer is "no", think carefully before making a commitment.
Layers Of Feeling - Coping With Passive Aggression
Many people are taught from a young age to suppress feelings commonly regarded as negative, such as anger, resentment, fear, and sorrow.
Those who cannot or will not express these emotions tend to engage in passive-aggressive behaviours that provide them with a means of redirecting their feelings.
Passive aggression can take many forms: People who feel guilty saying “no” may continually break their promises because they couldn't’t say no when they meant it.
Others will substitute snide praise for a slur to distance themselves from the intense emotions they feel.
More often than not, such behaviour is a cry for help uttered by those in need of compassion and gentle guidance.
When we recognise passive-aggressive patterns in the behaviour of others, we should never allow ourselves to be drawn into a struggle for power.
Passive aggression is most often wielded by those who feel powerless in the face of what they perceive as negative emotions because they hope to avoid confronting their true feelings.
They feel they are in control because they do not display overt emotion and often cannot understand how they have alienated their peers.
If someone close to us shows signs of frustration or annoyance but claims nothing is amiss, we can point out that their tone of voice or gestures are communicating a different message and invite them to confide in us.
When we feel slighted by a backhanded compliment, it is important that we calmly explain how the jibe made us feel and why.
And when an individual continually breaks their promises, we can help them understand that they are free to say no if they are unwilling to be of service.
As you learn to detect passive aggression, you may be surprised to see a hint of it in yourself.
Coping with the natural human tendency to veil intense emotions can be as simple as reminding yourself that expressing your true feelings is healthy.
The emotions typically regarded as negative will frequently be those that inspire you to change yourself and your life for the better, whereas passive-aggressive behaviour is a means of avoiding change.
When you deal constructively with your feelings, you can put them behind you and move forward unencumbered by unexplored emotion.
**************************************************************************
He that falls in love with himself will have no rivals.
If you tell the truth you don’t have to remember.
Anger makes you smaller, while forgiveness forces you to grow beyond what you were.
It is not fair to ask of others what you are unwilling to do yourself.
A mind troubled by doubt cannot focus on the course to victory.
People always call it luck when you have acted more sensibly than they have.
The only thing to do with good advice is pass it on. It is never any use to oneself.
Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle.
Drop the question what tomorrow may bring, and count as profit everyday that fate allows you.
No one is useless in this world who lightens the burdens of another.
A suspicious mind always looks on the black side of things.
Experience is what you get when you don’t get what you want.
Be silent as to services you have rendered, but speak of favours you have received.
It is not what we eat ,but what we digest ,that makes us strong;
not what we gain ,,but what we save ,that make us rich;
not what we read ,but what we remember,that makes us learned;
and not what we profess ,but what we practise ,that gives us Integrity.
BE THE DIFFERENCE
When things around you seem too noisy, hectic and out of control, be extra calm, peaceful and patient. If the people in your life seem too greedy and selfish, that's the time to be extra loving, giving and sincerely compassionate.
When the world seems a bit too confused and aimless, be extra focused and purposeful. For the world outside will soon reflect back to you the energy you give it.
If you don't like what you see, you have the opportunity to change it by changing the way you are. If there is darkness all around you, that's an opportunity for you to shine your own special light.
Even a small beacon in the darkness will shine for a long, long way. Choose to be the difference that makes a real difference, and your efforts will bear abundant fruit.
When things around you seem to be at their worst, that's when you can accomplish the most by being your best. That's when you can truly make a valuable, much-needed positive difference.
When trouble and confusion surround you, see the situation as the opportunity that it is. Shine your positive light in the face of negativity, and you will change your world.
Important Notice - ATM !!!
If you are ever forced by a thief or someone to take money out of an ATM machine, enter your pin number reversed. So if your number is 1254 mark 4521. The ATM machine will give you your money, but will automatically recognize this as a plea for help and will alert the police unknown to the thief. This option is in all ATM machines, but not many people know this. Please pass this information on to others. No harm in keeping this in mind !!
Stepping Back From Anger: Argument
When we find ourselves in an argument, we may feel like we are losing control of emotions that have taken on lives of their own. When we can become aware that this is happening, taking a deep breath can help us step back from the situation. Once we can separate ourselves from the heat of the moment, we may find that the emotional trigger that began the argument has little to do with the present situation, but may have brought up feelings related to something else entirely. Looking honestly at what caused our reaction allows us to consciously respond more appropriately to the situation and make the best choices.
We can make an agreement with our partners and those closest to us that asking questions can help all of us discover the source of the argument. The shared awareness can result in finding simple solutions to something physical, like low blood sugar or even a hormonal surge. Maybe we are taking ourselves too seriously, and we can just laugh and watch the tension dissolve. We could also discover that perhaps we are addicted to the excitement that drama brings and the chemicals that our body creates when we are angry. But there may be a deeper issue that requires discussion, understanding, and patience. The more we allow ourselves to step back and examine our reasons for arguing, the easier it becomes to allow real feelings to surface and guide us toward solutions that improve our lives.
When we can be clear about our feelings and intentions and communicate them clearly, we have a far better chance of getting what we want than if we lose control or allow our subconscious minds to manipulate the situation. We might take our frustrations out on the people closest to us because we feel safe and comfortable with them, but misplaced anger can cause more harm than good. Arguing for what we truly believe can empower us and help us to direct our passions toward greater life experiences. Truly knowing our reasons for arguing enables us to grow emotionally in ways that will affect our whole being.
I Embrance My Power - Being All I Am
Greetings, wondrous beings! Greetings to you! We are most pleased to be speaking with you in this manner. For there are those who want to know so very much about themselves. How can that be, you might wonder? How can it be that there are those who are awake, who have placed their feet upon the conscious journey, and who are asking others to tell them about their journey, about their inner most purposes? Ah! It is most natural to believe that another being knows more about you than you do of your own self. Why? Because, beloved one, you have been led to believe that you are a mere human and that there are others who are more spiritual, more knowing, and more able to direct your personal journey. Ah! Think of that, beloved one. Reflect upon it. While it is true that we have spoken with many about their own purposes, their own journey, it remains to be true that there is no one more all-knowing of you than you. And you might be saying that there are those who are more open and seem to see or know about your soul purposes, your soul journeys. And you might be saying that there are those who can tell you of such information. And you might be saying that you would like to know that information. And there is nothing wrong with such wanting, such procedures. Yet this speaking with you and for you is directly for your own personal next phase of residing incarnate.
Stop being lazy and discard old patterns. We say this to you with love and joy: do, dear ones, cease from being lazy. What does that mean? It means that now is the time to know for yourselves. Now is the time to discard all of those beliefs upon which your sleep state resides. Now is the time to discard all of those patterns that tell you that someone else can give to you your own soul information. And before we continue, we would also say that there is nothing wrong with all that you have been doing and seeking. And there is nothing wrong with continuing in that manner. What we are saying, dear ones, is that you are most capable of accessing all information for yourselves; and in such accessing there is a joy and, further, a stepping into the next phase of your journey…
Within the yearning to know more, there is also the pattern and portal to the fulfillment of such yearning. And you might be saying, "Pretty Flower, I have been trying to access my own information for a long time and have not been successful." To which we would say that now is the time for your fulfillment of being. Now is the time for you to enter into the manner of residing that speaks to you of easy access to anything you feel a yearning to know, to do, to reside within. And while it is true that in the called "past" you have found closed doors, closed portals, in the present there is something else going on. What is the something else? It is the veil, which you had placed about your full knowing, that can now be parted and, further, dissolved. Do you hear those words?
Many of you did place about your being, about your histories, a veil – for many different reasons. One reason was so that you would enjoy the journey to awakening. Another reason for some was the freedom to reside in a "brand–new" pattern. And there are as many reasons as there are beings. Yet there are now those who have gone before you, those who have dissolved the veils to the all-knowing, and those who have dared to incarnate fully; and in so doing, they have also dissolved the veil to their full capabilities, their full abilities, their full gifts and fulfillment of being. Those who have gone before you have now cleared the way for your own dissolving of your own veil, for your own accessing of that which you choose to access, to know, and for your own incarnating of the abilities for which you have yearned - those abilities you have observed in others and secretly and at times openly wished for yourself. Now is that time, beloved being. Now is that time of your own fulfillment. Go forward and fulfill your abilities. And what is that fulfillment?
Each being has abilities; each being has what has been called "gifts," and each being has the capability to know how to go forth with such abilities. For some, the ability is to assist others to heal, for others the ability is to call forth the all-knowing from other realms and place it into the hands of the multitudes, and yet for others their special and specific ability is to not only create portals to others' realms, but to enter and gather there those treasures that beg to be incarnate within this physicality. And much more! Much more! Each being can and will know of self.
Your abilities, which are already yours, which are already integrated within your soul encodings, are available to you now. All you would do would be to dissolve the veil, part the veil, and choose to access and incarnate the fullness of that which you are. How do you go forth in this manner? Ah, beloved beings, the answer is why we are speaking with you in this moment.
Nothing in this procedure is difficult. You might be saying that you have struggled in the past to no avail. Yet this is not. Now is different. And we could continue to speak upon how and why the now is different, yet we do choose to speak with you concerning how to part that veil, how to dissolve that veil, and to not only access that which is yours of you, but to begin to know of your abilities and capabilities. In this manner do we speak: First, recognize that the past within which you have been unable to access all that you chose to access is over. Those patterns and those manners of being are complete. Recognize that now is the time for your full use of the abilities you set forth for yourself before you entered this lifetime. When we say "recognize" we mean take a moment and truly recognize, truly know and accept that now is the time of your fulfillment. Nothing is held back from you. Nothing. Everything is proceeding for your assistance, for your fulfillment. Reflect upon this, beloved ones, and when you have from your mind those statements that say perhaps, "Sure, sure - for my assistance. I've been doing this alone for too long." When your mind says such things to you - laugh. That is correct; laugh at those statements. Why? You are God I Am incarnate; you are the all. You are not alone, cannot be alone. And the journey that has spoken such aloneness to you is over. Next, tell yourself that this next phase of living, of your fulfillment, is easy, is meant to be easy. Again, your mind might challenge such a statement, yet continue. Declare your ease of living, even in the face of the old patterns. Just tell yourself that this next phase of living is easy.
Next, close your eyes and allow yourself to recognize that which you have always wished you could do. For example, perhaps you have wished that you could easily access the akashic records - not only your own akashic, but perhaps that of the planets and realms, that of the histories of consciousness, that of the histories and patterns of colors and sounds, and much more. Perhaps you have always wished that you could assist others to heal themselves. Perhaps you have always wished that you could open and allow truths to be spoken from your own self. Perhaps you have always wanted to know which journey calls to you, as others seem to know for themselves. Perhaps you have always wanted to be creative, to paint, to write, to play music? Simply close your eyes and remember your yearnings. We are not saying to close your eyes and wish. We are asking you to recognize that for which you have longed. Take a moment to do this.
Next, breathe deeply inward, and when you breathe outward, determine that you will breathe outward the patterns and encodings that dissolve all veils to your all-knowing, to your fulfillment of being. Determine that your breath outward will and does dissolve any and all veils to the fullness of all that you are. Perhaps you would say these words or words of your own choosing: "By my divine right do I breathe the breath of dissolving all veils to my full expression of divine self. So be it." Proceed in this manner for three breaths, beloved ones. Then simply be. Allow. Perhaps you will want to repeat such a procedure, yet we say to you to remember, this is easy. As you do command, so be it. Easy. Ease of living. Then allow yourself to become accustomed to the full incarnating of all that you have yearned to be. Allow.
VERY MEANINGFUL - TAKE TIME AND READ PL.
A telephone operator told me that one day she received a phone call. She answered, 'Public Utilities Board.' There was silence. She repeated, 'PUB.' There was still no answer. When she was going to cut off the line, she heard a lady's voice, 'Oh, so this is PUB. Sorry, I got the number from my husband's pocket but I do not know whose number it is.'
Without mutual trust, just imagine what will happen to the couple if the telephone operator answered with just 'hello' instead of 'PUB'.
NO POINTING FINGERS
A man asked his father-in-law, 'Many people praised you for a successful marriage. Could you please share with me your secret?'
The father-in-law answered in a smile, 'Never criticize your wife for her shortcomings or when she does something wrong. Always bear in mind that because of her shortcomings and weaknesses, she could not find a better husband than you.'
We all look forward to being loved and respected. Many people are afraid of losing face. Generally, when a person makes a mistake, he would look around to find a scapegoat to point the finger at. This is the start of a war. We should always remember that when we point one finger at a person, the other four fingers are pointing at ourselves.
If we forgive the others, others will ignore our mistake too.
CREATING PERFECT RELATIONSHIPS?
There is a saying that a perfect match can only be found between a blind wife and a deaf husband, because the blind wife cannot see the faults of the husband and the deaf husband cannot hear the nagging of the wife. Many couples are blind and deaf at the courting stage and dream of perpetual perfect relationship. Unfortunately, when the excitement of love wears off, they wake up and discover that marriage is not a bed of roses. The nightmare begins.
NO OVERPOWERING
Many relationships fail because one party tries to overpower another, or demands too much. People in love tend to think that love will conquer all and their spouses will change the bad habits after marriage. Actually, this is not the case. There is a Chinese saying which carries the meaning that 'It is easier to reshape a mountain or a river than a person's character.'
It is not easy to change. Thus, having high expectations on changing the spouse's character will cause disappointment and unpleasantness.
It would be less painful to change ourselves and lower our expectations..
RIGHT SPEECH
A friend and her millionaire husband visited their construction site. A worker who wore a helmet saw her and shouted, 'Hi, Emily! Remember me? We used to date in the secondary school.' On the way home, her millionaire husband teased her, 'Luckily you married me. Otherwise you will be the wife of a construction worker.' She answered, 'You should appreciate that you married me. Otherwise, he will be the millionaire and not you.'
Frequently exchanging these remarks plants the seed for a bad relationship. It's like a broken egg - cannot be reversed.
PERSONAL PERCEPTION
Further on the way home, they met an old Lady. She commented, 'How can the man ride on the donkey but let the wife walk. He is no gentleman.' The husband thus quickly asked the wife to join him on the donkey. Then, they met a young man. He commented, 'Poor donkey, how can you hold up the weight of two persons. They are cruel to you.' Hearing that, the husband and wife immediately climbed down from the donkey and carried it on their shoulders.
It seems to be the only choice left. Later, on a narrow bridge, the donkey was frightened and struggled. They lost their balance and fell into the river. You can never have everyone praise you, nor will everyone condemn you. Never in the past, not at present, and never will be in the future.
Thus, do not be too bothered by others words if our conscience is clear..
BE PATIENT
Although the doctor tried desperately to save the crushed bones, he finally had to amputate the fingers from both the boy's hands. When the boy woke up from the surgery & saw his bandaged stubs, he innocently said, 'Daddy, I'm sorry about your truck.' Then he asked, 'but when are my fingers going to grow back?' The father went home & committed suicide.
Think about this story the next time someone steps on your feet or you wish to take revenge. Think first before you lose your patience with someone you love. Trucks can be repaired.. Broken bones & hurt feelings often can't. Too often we fail to recognize the difference between the person and the performance. We forget that forgiveness is greater than revenge.
People make mistakes. We are allowed to make mistakes. But the actions we take while in a rage will haunt us forever.
'Good Life starts only when you stop wanting a better One'
'Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away '
NOTE: Never break four things in your life - Trust, Promise, Relationship & Heart because when they break they do not make noise but pains a lot.
Cherish The Experience Of The Life
I found gratitude as a solution for peace in my life. Everytime I went into bitter experiences, I compelled myself to take a note book and start writing the things that I am thankful for. As I started doing this exercise suddenly I found myself so much happier and joyful and I also witnessed that my life is magically transformed to peace and wellness!
So I asked my husband and my children also to start doing this. We started to maintain Gratitude Journals deligently. As we practiced this Art, it brought so much peace and calm into our lives, everything started flowing smoothly, our mood was more on the happier side everyday. At this point I realized that being happy was more in harmony with who I was. I also understood that I became a divine magnet and whatever mood I portrayed on myself went out and attracted that which was harmonious to it and brought it to me!
I was so thrilled by this insight that everyday as I woke up from my bed and placed my foot on the floor, I started giving thanks. I expressed my feelings of love for God for all the wonderful things in my life, for the new day, for life, for family, for friends, for work, for health, for food, for clothing, for shelter, for love, for laughter, for beauty and on and on for the many things I felt so happy about. Then I thought about things that would make me happy and that was not with me at present, and I thought about those things and felt happy that they will come to me and went into bliss of Gratitude for them. This was great magic because the things I desired and gave thanks and felt happy for came to me in LIGHTNING SPEED!!!
Circle of Life
Think of your life as a circle. You're standing right in the middle of it. Anything beyond the edge is your discomfort zone, things like public speaking, asking for a raise, starting something new, changing, even fears of spiders and snakes. It's all there.
The quality and quantity of your fulfillment is determined by how often you expand your circle by taking risks. That's what it's all about.
Tell people what you really think. Ask your boss for that long deserved raise. Communicate your true feelings to your spouse. Quit your job and do something you like to do. Go up to a total stranger at a party and say, 'Hey!'
You know what your fears are. I'm just getting you started.
Don't know what your fears are? They're generally felt in the stomach, chest or throat. When you find it hard to breathe, or your stomach is a wreck, or your chest is tight, or you can't speak - chances are you're facing a fear [or you ate something funky.]
Facing that terrible feeling, figuring out what's causing it, and taking action is how you expand your circle. And every time you do it, the Light comes in and helps you to conquer other, bigger, nastier fears!
In five weeks we arrive at the kabbalistic New Year, which, practically-
That's why I'm launching a fast-track program designed for you to get the most of Rosh Hashanah. Over the next few weeks, the daily tune-ups will provide you with risk-taking assignments designed to stretch and increase your circle of miracles.
I hope you partake in them.
For this week, begin your preparation [if you haven't already] by taking emotional, physical and spiritual risks. Right now, as you read this, what's the scariest thing you can think of [that's not life-threatening, of course]?
That's your work for the week. Go to it. Keep asking yourself,
"What risk am I taking right now?"
Be brave. And let me know how it's going.
To Be Continued '' Benefits Of Forgiveness''
There are many cases we hear similar to this in which people draw upon inner strength and forgive those who hurt them or their loved ones. They recognize that their lives have changed for the better. Now, even medical researchers bear out the physical and mental benefits of forgiving.
Let us look at how forgiveness can benefit us physically, mentally, and spiritually. First, let us explore the physical benefits of forgiveness. The first thing to recognize is that we do physical harm to ourselves when we are caught up in the opposite of forgiveness: anger, hatred, and vengeance. These feelings cause damage to the physical body. Doctors and researchers are coming to realize that anger and hatred have detrimental effects on our body. Let us analyze the reason. First, there are certain responses in the physical body designed to help protect itself in order to preserve the species. When a living creature senses danger, there are certain hormonal and chemical reactions with the body that help it respond to danger. These hormones cause one to fight or take flight. They are useful for giving the body strength and quick physical responses such as running or protecting one's self. But if one interprets as life-threatening problems of daily life that are not life-threatening then one is responding with the fight or flight hormones for no reason. The result is that we do not see a need to flee or fight, but we feel threatened. This is converted into anger or rage. Thus, we are becoming angry over situations that do not threaten our life. This causes the body to circulate the hormones needed to run or protect one's self over minor situations that are part of daily life. Because these hormones, such as cortisol, are circulating through us when we do not need them, they end up causing damage to the physical body. We know for example that real cortisone has side effects to the body and doctors recommend them very cautiously. But the body's natural cortisal when we are angry or under stress ends up circulating through us causing stress-related ailments. If one is continually in that state of fear, anger, or stress those hormones cause a breakdown in other body tissues. This is what causes stress-related ailments such as digestive problems, headaches, heart problems, skin problems, and breathing problems.
To Be Contuned '' Benefits Of Forgiveness ''
We hear accounts of people who were victims or whose loved ones were victims of horrendous crimes. Some people may have lost their child, a spouse, a loved, one or both parents to death at the hands of cruel and heartless people. When interviewed, some who lost loved ones shared their startling revelations. They learned that their own lives were transformed by the power of forgiveness. They found that their own physical, mental, and spiritual health improved through the power of forgiving those who had wronged or hurt them.
The news once reported a story about two parents whose daughter was the victim of a cruel murder many years ago, and they spent every waking day seeing that the person responsible was brought to justice. They wanted to do everything possible to see that the murderer was punished. It so happened that the crime was committed by a young person when he was less than eighteen years of age. Although a juvenile, he was sentenced to life imprisonment. The parents who lost their child said that their lives were filled with hatred, anger, and revenge towards the teenager. These feelings occupied all their waking thoughts. It made them physically sick. They could not even focus on spirituality because they were so angry with God for what had happened. Then, one day they realized that they had spent many years in this state of anger. They took the decision that not only had their child's life been lost, but both of their lives were also being lost to anger, hatred, and revenge. Then, they did the unthinkable. They decided to forgive the person who had committed the crime. They actually went to the prison where the person was incarcerated and told him they had forgiven him. They met the parents of the boy who committed the crime and realized how much they too were suffering by what their son had done. Instead of being angry with the boy's parents, they felt compassion that they too had in a way lost their son as he was sentenced to prison. Through forgiving the boy and his family, the parents experienced such a release of their pain that they could not believe it. Suddenly, they felt a great burden was lifted from their hearts. The person who had committed the crime when he was a young man was also moved by their power of forgiveness and was transformed by their love. They realized that through forgiving the perpetrator, they had in a way saved their own lives from further deterioration. Their health improved, they were able to function mentally again, and they felt the love of God flow through them.
Time Are Good For Me And My Family
Three Reasons You Are Not Thriving
Have A Wonderful Sunday
This assumes that what Abraham Lincoln said is true, that "most folks are about as happy as they make up their minds to be." Happiness is from within, it is not a matter of externals.
Just for today, I will try to adjust myself to what is and not try to adjust everything to my own desires.
I will take my family, my business and my luck as they come and fit myself to them.
Just for today, I will take care of my body.
I will exercise it, care for it, nourish it, not abuse it nor neglect it, so that it will be a perfect machine for my bidding.
Just for today, I will try to strengthen my mind.
I will learn something useful. I will not be a mental loafer. I will read something that requires effort, thought and concentration.
Just for today, I will exercise my soul at least three ways.
I will do somebody a good turn and not get found out. I will do at least two things I don't want to do, as William James suggests, just for exercise.
Just for today I will be agreeable.
I will look as well as I can, dress as becomingly as possible, talk low, act courteously, be liberal with praise, criticize not at all, not find fault with anything and not try to regulate nor improve anyone.
Just for today, I will try to live through this day only.
Not to tackle my whole life problems at once. I can do things for twelve hours that would appall me if I had to keep them up for a lifetime.
Just for today I will have a program.
I will write down what I expect to do every hour. I may not follow it exactly, but I will have it. It will eliminate two pests, hurry and indecision.
Just for today I will have a quiet half-hour all by myself and relax.
In this half-hour sometimes I will meditate, so as to get a little more perspective into my life.
Just for today, I will be unafraid.
Especially I will not be afraid to be happy, to enjoy what is beautiful, to love, and to believe that those I love, love me.
Benefits Of Forgiveness
Forgiveness I: Benefits of Forgiveness
This week, a series of articles and helpful information about forgiveness will be shared in this newsletter. The first is an article from my beloved Spiritual Teacher, Sant Rajinder Singh Ji Maharaj, on the benefits of forgiveness. It is taken from the March '05 issue of Sat Sandesh magazine. His teachings on meditation on the inner light and sound, and my practicing the same, have transformed my life completely and brought in much inner and outer peace and joy. I wish that same inner peace and joy for you. If you can find an SOS center in your area (see www.sos.org for details of centers ) , I encourage you to enroll in their free Jyoti meditation classes. Enjoy!
Love, Dayu
~~~
Benefits of Forgiveness
The following is a talk given by Sant Rajinder Singh Ji Maharaj.
the same troubles. When we read or listen
to the news, we find that people all over the world are struggling with the pain they suffer themselves, or the pain of their loved ones, neighbors, or even fellow citizens of the world who have been victims of some kind of injury or loss. The amount of pain in the world causes many people to feel anger, hatred, and revenge to the perpetrators of crime or injustice. I am often asked how we can deal with these situations.
In this connection, I would like to relate an anecdote. Once there was a warrior who went to a wise monk and asked him, "What is the difference between heaven and hell?" The monk looked at this warrior who was very large, muscular, and had a savage look about him. The monk then replied, "You ignorant brute. You are nothing but a savage. Why would I waste time with you teaching you about heaven and hell?" When the monk said that, the warrior's blood began to boil and he was filled with anger and hatred. Suddenly, he could not control his temper and he started beating up the monk. After a few moments, the warrior realized what a heinous act he was committing and stopped. The monk smiled and said, "That fit of anger is hell." The warrior was so ashamed for his violent act and begged the monk to forgive him. The monk again smiled and said, "Your asking for forgiveness is heaven."
This story describes in a nutshell the answer to the question about dealing with all the violence, injustice, and evil in the world. We can choose to respond in kind, which creates more of a hell, or we can respond with forgiveness, which creates heaven in our own lives on earth